Ever heard the expression, “The New Black“? If you read fashion blogs, fashion magazines or galavant in such circles socially–online and in real life, you’ve heard it a million times or so. But who’s counting? I am.

{ Architecture of an Outfit / OOTD } The New Black

I’m sick of the phrase. I’ve heard it more times than there are grains of sand on the white sandy beaches of Hawaii. No, I jest.

But honestly, hyperbole aside, each season some in the box editor or associate writer or blogger, writer or whoever, declares some item “the New Black”, heralding the item/color/trend as the newest, biggest, baddest thing to ever grace the planet in the History of Ever. Well, you know what? Everything you proclaim as being the Newest Greatest Thing is nowhere near as versatile as black or any other neutral. Black has always been around, and nothing makes it new, nor can any other item replace nude, white (or off white, in my case), grey, beige or navy. Neutrals are timeless, that is to say, beyond time, withstanding time, perpetual, constant, ageless, which means they are beyond value and irreplaceable.

Neutrals are chic grounding shades that pull together an outfit. They’re the simplest and most basic of tones, and are the most common in nature. Which makes them eternally perfect. Towering head and shoulders above the rest, black is the boldest and strongest.

In scientific terms, black is the absence of light reflection, but rather the absorption of all frequencies of light. Black is therefore strongest color, because it absorbs (contains) all other colors. If you think about that symbolically, that makes black the kingpin of all colors, because it eats up every other color in the light spectrum. Um, so really, pink is NOT the new black, because black ate pink for breakfast and shat orange and leopard before eating teal and red for lunch.

Black is timeless (as are all neutrals), and it hides the sins that other colors can’t. BECAUSE IT ABSORBS THEM AND HIDES THEM WHERE THE SUN DON’T SHINE.

I like this dress. It’s simple. Not my best silhouette, but sometimes, keeping it easy with a pull-over dress is so refreshing. And it hides the muffin top. (If only it would hide my hair.)

Outfit Architecture:
Dress:: Empire-waist pull-over circle minidress, Causeway Mall
Scarf:: Leopard Print cotton square, H&M
Socks:: Knee Highs, Target
Shoes:: Patent strappy platforms, Jeffrey Campbell
Bracelet:: Gold Birdcage Bangle, JewelMint
Earrings:: Disco dangle earrings, Causeway Mall
Ring:: Studded bow, Causeway Mall

Where to Shop / Alternatives
Dress:: (High end) Lace 3/4 sleeve circle mini dress
Dress:: (High street) 3/4 sleeve scoop neck dress
Scarf:: Cashmere leopard scarf
Shoes::
Earrings::
Ring::

In Summary
Keep it simple, stupid. Simple is the new black. Which is to say, there is no new black.

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