Travel to Cape Breton Island, Nova Scotia, Canada Day 1 Photo Diary. (Picture heavy post.)

I tried to do One Photo Every Hour for that day, but I hate fiddling with my camera a bunch when I have to take multiple plane rides and family is involved. I don’t want them thinking I’m more vain and weirder than they already must think I am–blogging and understanding blogging involves a different sort of mentality. Esp if you’re blogging about yourself and your style.

7AM: DTW, Detroit Metro Airport.
Sunrise over the tarmac. Sat next to a cross dresser. … See below diary entry.

8AM: DTW >> ATL airport

10:00AM Hartsfield Jackson International Airport, Atlanta, GA.
Waiting for the plane on the layover. I loathe this airport.

10:50AM: Travel Outfit, ATL
About to board the plane. This is the best outfit shot of my travel outfit I have. Leggings, walking boots (not the most flattering to my legs, I know), leopard button down, leopard scarf (double leopard, so tacky!), Icelandic cape-style cotton hoodie coat. No makeup.

11AM: ATL
Mama (in-law), on the plane, waiting to take off.

12:00PM: Travel Essentials – Strivectin Eye Cream and DiorSnow UV Shield SPF 50 PA ++
Eye cream to rehydrate dry eye lids and Sunscreen for protection from the stronger UV rays coming through the window.

1:30PM: Canadian Customs Form
I had no $10,000 or any fun merchandise to claim.

2:00PM: Landing in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada
The gorgeous Nova Scotia landscape seen from the skies as we land.

3:30PM (Nova Scotia Time) Halifax Airport

4PM Transit, Halifax, NS
Sister-in-law (Seestar) driving us in the most gigantic truck (GMC Yukon) up to Port Hawkesbury in Cape Breton, NS. See Diary notes below.

4:30PM Cute Kid
My nephew, HB, AKA “Neph-piece”, all of 15 months and as loud as he is adorable and lovable. (Basically, a LOT, on all three counts!)

5PM Cute Mestizo Filipino (Hapa/Half) guy with some melons
Nate jokes around as we go grocery shopping for our condo.

5:30PM
3 Vegetarians, 1 Vegan, 1 Southerner and 1 baby don’t eat cheap and don’t eat just a little.

6:00PM Port Hawkesbury >> Port Hood, Cape Breton Island, Nova Scotia, Canada
Husby, reading emails.

6:30PM The highway somewhere on the way to Judique, Nova Scotia

7:00PM Self portraits
The Golden Hour makes for the best photos… even if I look kinda travel-worn and gross without makeup.

7:30PM Cape Breton Sunset seen from Port Hood Place
Our vacation home, at last. This was the view of the Sunset from our balcony at Port Hood Place Luxury Condo, probably one of the ONLY condos in all of Cape Breton (save for those in Sydney). Gorgeous end to a long day.

TRAVEL DIARY ENTRY

Detroit >> ATL leg
4:45AM wake up after staying up until 3:45AM to get guest post blogs up. 7AM flight. Pick up mother in law, get to airport parking, shuttle to DTW, check-in bags. In my security queue, I get stuck behind the most effing clueless family ever with 8 members (5 of them children) who try to take a boogy board and a laptop THROUGH the body scanner. Seriously? It literally took me 20 minutes to get through security clearance just from the time I got to the belt to the time I got through the scanner. That is a total of, like, 30 feet. OMG.

Get to gate finally. We’re on a plane with a cross dresser who looks oddly like Mr. Burns from The Simpsons, with metallic turquoise eye shadow, black eyeliner, bad lipstick, too much bronzer, nasty nails under pink pearl polish (fingers and toes), long flowing white hair (balding like Mr. Burns) and a boho peasant top and a turquoise midi peasant skirt–both about 5 years out of date. Awesome. He sits across the aisle from us. Couldn’t sneak a photo. Without looking WAY conspicuous. But I assure you, he was rather colorful and not in a good way.

ATL Layover
2 hour layover. What a stupid route. 1.5 hours SOUTH to go 4 hours North again? Idiotic.

Airplanes and Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport, Atlanta both totally suck. Whenever I fly through ATL, something goes wrong. Gates change without notification, planes get delayed, planes stuck on tarmac getting in and out, they have lost our bags TWICE. The first time was on my HONEYMOON during which I had no luggage, no toiletries, no clothes, no underwear, no makeup except those I had brought with me and which Delta comped (a small shaving kit with toothbrush & a t-shirt) for THREE DAYS. I hate Delta, and I LOATHE Hatfsfield Jackson airport.

Atlanta itself is way cool. I loved staying there in April, when I got to tour Decatur, GA with the the Asian Cajuns girls.

Can we just buy an 8 year old?
We landed in Halifax and my sister in law picked us up with her family in the big rig we all rented for the week. GMC Yukon (seats 8, we had 6 and TONS OF BAGGAGE FOR THE BABY). GUZZLE.

I had no idea babies are so travel, baggage, equipment and labor intensive. Seestar and Bro (my sister and brother in law’s nicknames) enjoy the shit out of Neph-piece, but it looks like a LOT of hard work. I was exhausted just playing Cool Auntie, and N and I didn’t do 10% of what they had to do. Husby kept saying, “we’re just going to buy an 8 year old when it’s time for kids.” Well, aside from the Human-Trafficking implications of that statement, I’ll agree whole-heartedly. Let’s skip the hard parts and get to the good stuff.

Neph-piece is a piece of work. In all aspects. You can already see his eccentricities and personality come out. A nerd in training, he adores him some Apple, and we’re not talking Michigan Jona Golds. iPads, iPhones–he sees one and he will chase it, yelling “Ama, Ama! (I think that’s his word for, “hey, lemme see that” and also “where ma milk at?”). He’s happy, funny, talkative and quirky as heck (he smelled a dandelion flower one day, and then ate it the next second). He is the most adorable baby, EVER. Most babies look like men or aliens, but this little guy is actually as cute as they come. Perhaps it’s the doting aunt in me talking.

But, man! Is he loud. His universal languages are Baby Babble and Screech. Happy, confused, anxious, scared, angry, frustrated, hungry or sleepy, Screech generally is his choice language. He might grow up to be an actor or a singer. He’s got the pipes and he’s definitely got a very entertaining, All-Eyes-On-Me kind of personality. He’s definitely one of the most intelligent babies I’ve ever met and the funniest. I don’t think I’ve ever chortled so much on account of a baby’s antics. Granted, I’ve never had the pleasure of knowing many babies in my life, but Punky is definitely the coolest. Possibly one of the only cool ones. Most other people’s babies or children, I want to duct tape their faces shut. However, our little Punky is for sure louder than most toddlers. It’ll be a good thing when he’s an adult, of that I am certain. He’ll never be a wall-flower and will never lack for friends.

Vegetarians + a Southerner don’t eat cheap!
We went back to Sobey’s grocery store in Port Hawkesbury and grabbed almost $300 worth of food. 5 adults (a Southerner among us!) and a vegetarian baby don’t eat cheaply! We went back to Sobey’s a good 3 more times during our stay in Cape Breton for more veggies, eggs and milk. (YIPES.) On the flip side, we only ate out TWICE the entire time we were there and cooked ourselves food the rest of the time. We didn’t end up throwing out much and gave the excess food to Mama’s cousin in his senior home before we left. (GREEN!)

Finally, an end.
We pulled up to the hill to our condo unit around 7:30, and unloaded our groceries, put the kid to bed and popped open beers from one of the TWO CASES we bought just before we got into town. We watched the sun set over the Atlantic and blaze salmon, peach and lilac over Port Hood Island across the narrow straight, while we sipped on Coronas and relaxed as my first evening in Cape Breton Island drew to a close.

Did you guys enjoy my Day 1?

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